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13 things your burglar won’t tell you

I got this in an email the other day. Presumably these helpful hints were gleaned from conversations from some 105 burglars in North Carolina, Oregon, California, and Kentucky. There are actually 21 of them – a list of 13 and another list of 8 that seems to have joined later:

  1. Of course I look familiar. I was here just last week cleaning
    your carpets, painting your shutters, or delivering your new refrigerator.
  2. Hey, thanks for letting me use the bathroom when I was working in
    your yard last week. While I was in there, I unlatched the back window to
    make my return a little easier.
  3. Love those flowers. That tells me you have taste… and taste
    means there are nice things inside. Those yard toys your kids leave out
    always make me wonder what type of gaming system they have.
  4. Yes, I really do look for newspapers piled up on the driveway.
    And I might leave a pizza flyer in your front door to see how long it takes
    you to remove it..
  5. If it snows while you’re out of town, get a neighbor to create
    car and foot tracks into the house.. Virgin drifts in the driveway are a
    dead giveaway.
  6. If decorative glass is part of your front entrance, don’t let
    your alarm company install the control pad where I can see if it’s set. That
    makes it too easy.
  7. A good security company alarms the window over the sink. And the
    windows on the second floor, which often access the master bedroom – and
    your jewelry. It’s not a bad idea to put motion detectors up there too.
  8. It’s raining, you’re fumbling with your umbrella, and you forget
    to lock your door – understandable. But understand this: I don’t take a day
    off because of bad weather.
  9. I always knock first. If you answer, I’ll ask for directions
    somewhere or offer to clean your gutters. (Don’t take me up on it.)
  10. Do you really think I won’t look in your sock drawer? I always
    check dresser drawers, the bedside table, and the medicine cabinet.
  11. Here’s a helpful hint: I almost never go into kids’ rooms.
  12. You’re right: I won’t have enough time to break into that safe
    where you keep your valuables. But if it’s not bolted down, I’ll take it
    with me.
  13. A loud TV or radio can be a better deterrent than the best alarm
    system. If you’re reluctant to leave your TV on while you’re out of town,
    you can buy a $35 device that works on a timer and simulates the flickering
    glow of a real television. (Find it at http://www.faketv.com/)
  14. Sometimes, I carry a clipboard. Sometimes, I dress like a lawn
    guy and carry a rake. I do my best to never, ever look like a crook.
  15. The two things I hate most: loud dogs and nosy neighbors.
  16. I’ll break a window to get in, even if it makes a little noise. If your neighbor hears one loud sound, he’ll stop what he’s doing and wait to hear it again. If he doesn’t hear it again, he’ll just go back to what he was doing. It’s human nature.
  17. I’m not complaining, but why would you pay all that money for a fancy alarm system and leave your house without setting it?
  18. I love looking in your windows. I’m looking for signs that you’re
    home, and for flat screen TVs or gaming systems I’d like. I’ll drive or walk
    through your neighborhood at night, before you close the blinds, just to
    pick my targets.
  19. Avoid announcing your vacation on your Facebook page. It’s easier
    than you think to look up your address.
  20. To you, leaving that window open just a crack during the day is a
    way to let in a little fresh air. To me, it’s an invitation.
  21. If you don’t answer when I knock, I try the door. Occasionally, I
    hit the jackpot and walk right in.

If you see yourself in any of these scenarios, pay heed.

Tip o’ the hat to Kathy!

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